deltie.net archive

Extracted abstract

Changing socio-economic conditions are enticing more and more Nigerian mothers to work and pursue careers. This article explores how middle-class professional women navigate working mother subjectivities in the context of Nigeria's strong patriarchal culture, where traditional notions of maternal femininity prevail. We argue that the working mother subjectivity is a key site where the struggle over gendered cultural meanings takes place.

Drawing on 32 qualitative interviews, we demonstrate how a small group of women refused traditional feminine subject positions; however, most either embraced or reluctantly acquiesced to them, despite having access to broader cultural repertoires and material resources. By unveiling the complexities of the cultural appeal of traditional femininity and social penalties for breaching it, the article extends our understanding of how patriarchal cultures resist gendered change and the nuances and limits of individual patterns of resistance.

INTRODUCTION

In the last decade a substantial body of literature has explored how working mothers, particularly those in demanding careers, navigate 'competing devotions' of motherhood and career, and the implications this has for gender (in)equality (Blair-Loy 2005; Christopher 2012; Dow 2019) . In response to recent criticisms of the Western-centric focus in much of this theorizing, more analyses have begun to emerge that explore working mothers' experiences in the 'Global South', including sub-Saharan Africa (e.g. Adisa et al. 2019; 2021; Stumbitz and Jaga 2020; Amah 2021; Ajonbadi et al. 2023; Epie, 2023; Odunsi and Hosek 2024) . These studies have documented multiple organizational, social and family factors that exacerbate mothers' work-family conflict. However, little attention has been paid so far to understanding the implications that these conflicting experiences may have for traditional gender role configurations prevalent in these patriarchal contexts. Given the rapidly increasing number of women in sub-Saharan Africa's workforce (Statista 2023) , and that the incompatibility of motherhood responsibilities and employment has been shown to change women's traditional gender attitudes (Evans 2014; Zhou 2017 ), such analysis is particularly pertinent. This article aims to explore how working mothers in demanding professional jobs in Nigeria navigate traditional ideals of motherhood and femininity in order to further understand the constraints and possibilities of re-configuring gender in patriarchal contexts.

To address this question, we draw on feminist analysis that approaches femininity as a vital site of gendered power dynamics and suggests that various constructions of femininity can both reproduce but also resist the gendered status quo (Moore 2015; Heath 2019; Kamran 2021) . While several studies have explored how women from lower socio-economic backgrounds navigate traditional femininity in patriarchal contexts, we focus on the accounts of more privileged middle-class working mothers in Nigeria aims to deepen the understanding of these dynamics. Nigeria offers an interesting context to explore this. On the one hand, it is characterized by a strong patriarchal culture, where traditional ideals of femininity are firmly associated with motherhood, submission and domesticity (Adisa et al. 2019; 2021; Mordi et al. 2023) . However, economic conditions are driving more women to pursue careers, with approximately 80% of Nigerian households reporting both partners working (NBS 2013; Amah 2021) . Furthermore, the global discourse on women's rights (Tripp et al. 2009 ) and the rise of social media has given voice to popular African feminisms (Adichie 2014 ) and exposed Nigerian women to the 'Western' cultural imaginaries of a successful career woman, empowerment and choice (Dosekun 2015; Bawa and Ogunyankin 2017) . Professional middle-class women, in particular, have wider access to this broad range of cultural repertoires to interpret their experiences (Swidler 2001) and possess material resources that may enable wider social choices. By exploring how they navigate conflicting ideals of femininity, we aim to extend understanding of how traditional cultures resist or may be influenced by new gendered ideals for change (Jung and Moon 2024) .

Drawing on 32 qualitative interviews with professional working mothers in Nigerian urban centers, the article extends the growing analysis of the lived experiences of working mothers in sub-Saharan Africa (Adisa et al. 2019; 2021; Epie, 2023; Odunsi and Hosek 2024) by arguing that working mother subjectivity represents a key site of the gendered power struggle for Nigerian women, where both disruption and reproduction of the patriarchal culture can occur. We show how these middle-class mothers make sense of themselves vis-a-vis traditional ideals of femininity in three ways: some embrace traditional maternal femininity, some ambivalently acquiesce to it, and only a small minority refuses it in favor of new repertoires of emancipation. Our analysis extends the current understanding of micro-politics of women's resistance in patriarchal societies (Moore 2015; Heath 2019; Kamran 2021; Oktaviani et al., 2021; Jung and Moon 2024) by showing how adopting the more traditional subject positions are shaped by both its social appeal and harsh social penalties for divergence, which most women middle-class women were unable or/and unwilling to accept despite (and sometimes because) of possessing better material and cultural resources. Through unveiling how the refusal of traditional maternal femininity is culturally and socially policed amongst middle-class women in Nigeria, we add further nuance to sociological knowledge about the mechanisms of how patriarchal societies resist change.

WORKING MOTHERS IN NIGERIA AND WORK-LIFE CONFLICT

Nigeria is one of the most populous countries in sub-Saharan Africa and the share of women in Nigeria's labor force has grown progressively to 53% in 2023 (Statista 2023) . The country's 2020 Voluntary National Review on Sustainable Development Goals underscored gender equality as a focal issue requiring concerted attention (United Nations 2020). However, while Nigeria has committed to various global and regional treaties promoting gender equality, significant gender disparities persist in politics, education, and employment (Ayodeji and Ade-Ibijola 2022) .

Nigerian mothers face significant career progression obstacles, discrimination and widespread hostility in professional and managerial jobs (Adisa et al. 2019; 2021; Amah 2021; Odunsi and Hosek 2024) as professional working environments are characterized by a rigid system of strictly enforced gender roles 'hypermasculinity' or an inflated sense of male dominance, and a propensity for gender-based exploitation and abuse (Adisa et al. 2021) .

Furthermore, even in urban dual-earner Nigerian households strong societal expectations persist about women's primary roles as caregivers and homemakers and mothers bear the disproportionate burden of domestic and child-care responsibilities (Adisa et al. 2019; Mordi et al. 2023) . Nigerian Labor Act does not include any provisions allowing employees to request flexible working hours (Sadanandan and Paul 2022) , and there is also a lack of state support such as housing subsidies, child benefits, and income support, which are common in most Western countries (Mordi et al. 2023) . Consequently, working mothers depend significantly on extended family and community support (Amah 2021) or rely on relatively cheap labor of domestic workers, which is not unproblematic (Adisa et al. 2019; 2021; Mordi et al. 2023) .

Thus, research agrees that professional working mothers experience severe pressures when balancing careers and family (Ajonbadi et al. 2023) .

Existing analyses have predominantly focused on unveiling how patriarchal culture translates into workplace inequalities, exacerbating working mothers' work-family conflict or identifying mothers' coping strategies. However, navigating work-family commitments is not just a technical exercise but is profoundly linked to how women construct their subjectivities or a sense of self, and as good workers or good mothers (Adamson et al. 2023 ). In the Western context, for instance, many professional women continue to chase an extremely socially appealing ideal of a 'successfully balanced' working mother (Adamson, 2017) who 'has it all' even though the pursuit of this cultural fantasy tends to result in burn out, maternal guilt and can push women to 'opt out' of successful careers (Orgad 2019 ). Yet, Western working mothers also creatively reframe the meanings of 'good mothering' thus 'undoing' at least some of the dominant gendered meanings (Christopher 2012; Dow 2019) . As more and more professional Nigerian mothers are experiencing severe conflict between traditional ideals of motherhood as a primary woman's calling and new imaginaries of career success, it is important to understand whether or how these experiences may lead to reconfiguring of the traditional feminine gender roles in this patriarchal context. To explore this, below we build on the recent analysis of femininity and social change.

FEMININITY CONFIGURATIONS, RESISTANCE AND GENDERED SOCIAL

CHANGE

The relationship between configurations of femininity and social change has been the focal point of much feminist analysis, which shows that femininity is a site of regulation and negotiation of gender norms (Dosekun 2015; Moore 2015; Heath 2019; Kamran 2021; Oktavini et al., 2021) . Some forms of femininity, often described as traditional are 'characterized by compliance with women's subordination and an orientation towards accommodating the interests and desires of men' (Connell 1987 , 184 in Schippers 2007, 86) , work to reproduce patriarchal structure. However, women may resist patriarchal culture by adopting different forms of femininity (Kandiyoti 1988) . Moore (2015) , for instance, shows how some rural women in South Africa adopted ambivalent femininity which involved 'passive' resistance, i.e. adhering to traditionalist expectations but displaying dissatisfaction with oppressive practices. Others adopted alternative femininity using more active strategies of challenging subordination. Jaji's (2014) study of refugee women in Kenya reveals a similar typology. For instance, many poor married women performed traditional femininity to remain in marriage, but some displayed an 'agitated' femininity, which manifested as disgruntlement and questioning the gendered norms of marriage and submission. Unmarried women, on the other hand, demonstrated rebellious femininity, which worked as a resource to challenge stereotypical views of gender. Kamran (2021) further argues that working-class women market traders switched between the traditional and more stigmatized forms of femininity when trading and, through this, were 'undoing' some constructions of gender. Overall, these studies show the value of developing a contextually situated understanding of the micro-politics of resistance or how everyday practices and construction of new meanings may challenge the structures of domination in patriarchal cultures (Kandiyoti 1988; Heath 2019) .

Most research of femininity configurations and resistance in the context of the Global South has, understandably, focused on women who inhabit marginalized or lower socioeconomic class positions or come from rural areas (Jaji 2014; Balogun 2015; Dosekun 2015; Moore 2015; Stumbitz and Jaga 2020; Kamran 2021) . Less consideration has been given to understanding how more privileged and middle-class women navigate traditional femininities (Octaviani et al. 2021) . Partly, this lack of attention may be underpinned by the assumption that middle-class women hold more economic and cultural capital and power and possibly suffer 'less' oppression. Indeed, all our interviewees were well-educated and held relatively privileged and well-paid jobs. Furthermore, middle-class women also have access to broader and more diverse cultural capital and resource through access to higher education, social media, wider international networks and so on; hence, they possess a wider range of cultural repertoires to interpret and reconfigure their feminine subjectivities (Swidler 2001) . We argue that this is what makes this population theoretically interesting, as it allows us to explore whether these women are better able to resist traditional configurations of femininity or/and whether different resources may potentially translate into different strategies of resistance that challenge traditional femininity. In doing so, we aim to expand our understanding of how patriarchal cultures resist or may be penetrated by the new gendered ideals (Jung and Moon 2024) .

Given the focus on the more privileged group of women, resistance or adherence to traditional roles needs to be understood beyond explicit coercion. Therefore, we approach our analyses of femininity from the feminist poststructuralist perspective as it is a particularly useful way of understanding why individuals comply with certain oppressive practices in the absence of direct physical force or the threat of violence (Gavey 2011) . In fact, while existing research explores the different forms of femininity that may constitute resistance (Jaji 2014; Moore 2015; Kamran 2021 ), more analysis is needed on what entices women to adopt these.

Feminist poststructuralist approach, underpinned by Foucauldian understanding of power, can be useful here. It suggests that competing social discourses offer individuals various subject positions or ways of being in the world, and that individuals make sense of themselves through adopting these socially and historically specific subjectivities (Weedon 1987) . While the dominant discourses construct subject positions that sustain the status quo, social change arises out of contestation between discourses, as new discourses offer alternative subject positions that may be more appealing (Weedon 1987) . Hence, resistance here somewhat depends on the availability of alternatives in the broader cultural repertoire of discursive resources (Swidler 2001; Octaviani et al. 2021) . For instance, Balogun has illustrated how African women are constructed 'as cultural bearers of tradition through tropes of domesticity, motherhood, and modesty', yet at the same time, they are also 'symbols of modernization through discourses of work, politics, and sexuality…' (Balogun 2012, 357) . In theoretical terms, the presence of these competing discourses opens the space for change to the dominant femininity ideals. New discourses may be marginalized, for instance, feminist discourses are often relegated as 'un-African' (Adichie 2014 ). Yet, the emergence and presence of alternative repertoires offer subjects new vocabularies, creating the potential for destabilizing certain traditional configurations of femininity.

Motherhood is a particularly strongly regulated feminine subjectivity in patriarchal societies. In Nigeria, the traditional ideal of femininity is strongly linked to maternity, domestication and subordination (Adisa et al. 2019; Mordi et al. 2023) . Marriage is seen as a key identity and aspiration for women, and divorce incurs significant stigma and social penalty (Lazarus et al. 2017) . This ideal of motherhood as a primary woman's role is underpinned by a complex mix of cultural, historical and religious discourses as post-colonial Africa is often described as having a "triple heritage" of indigenous practices, as well as colonization and the spread of Christianity and Islam (Mazrui 1983; Jaji 2014) . It is rooted in cultural customs of prioritizing communal child-rearing and strong family bonds (Dow 2019) . It is also reinforced in both Islamic and Christian teachings, emphasizing motherhood as a sacred duty of women and the virtue of submissiveness to men in the private and public domain (Kaunda and Pokol 2019) . Moreover, in a complex entanglement of post-colonialism and nation-building, traditional maternal femininity is also about representing and belonging to the national community (Balogun 2012; Lazarus et al. 2017) . For instance, Western feminist discourses remain marginal as feminism is perceived as a 'man-hating philosophy' that rejects marriage and motherhood, promoting emasculation of men which is 'un-African' and at odds with traditional African values (Norwood, 2013; Adichie 2014 ).

However, new discourses are also emerging, offering women alternative ways of making sense of themselves as working mothers. National and international advocacy organizations have popularized the discourse of women's equality and economic rights (Tripp et al. 2009) . Nigerian women are increasingly cognizant of the existing gender gap, experiences of marginalization and social injustice (Omontese 2023 ) and awareness can be key to resistance of subordination (Evans 2014; Moore 2015) . The burgeoning social media has been pivotal in popularizing the new vocabularies of women's empowerment and career aspirations. Social media and digital platforms have amplified the voice of women's movements that advocate for greater inclusion of women across societal spheres (Chiluwa 2022 ) and offered space for grassroots campaigns that challenge day-to-day entrenched gender norms and stereotypes (Omontese 2023) . Media platforms allow women to debate and learn about the complexities of African womanhood and African feminism (Norwood 2013; Lawal et al. 2022) . Here is also where transnational popular feminist imagery of an empowered and successful career woman figure circulates, and while these discourses translate in complex ways into local culture (Dosekun 2015; Bawa and Ogunyankin 2017) , they nonetheless offer new alternative cultural repertoires of constructing femininity and motherhood. Against this complex socio-cultural background, we set out to investigate how professional Nigerian women make sense of themselves and negotiate the dominant traditional ideals of maternal femininity and emerging discourses of career and emancipation.

METHODS

The study draws on qualitative analysis that enables an in-depth exploration of women's accounts. We utilized purposive sampling to recruit and interview 32 working mothers in Nigeria. We were interested in the dynamics of navigating the self while balancing career and family, so we sought participants who worked in professional and managerial jobs, and who had a spouse or partner and (at least one) dependent child. The participants were recruited in major urban cities across four States in Nigeria, including Lagos, Abuja, Kano and Rivers, as most middle-class professionals tend to be concentrated in major urban centers. The initial call was circulated through social media and personal and professional networks, particularly within Nigerian WhatsApp groups dedicated to academic discussions, where some authors are active participantswith subsequent snowball sampling through referrals from our initial contacts.

As indicated in the table (see Table 1 for participants' demographic profiles), our interviewees were highly educated and worked in professional jobs in different sectors of the economy.

Insert Table 1 about here

We acknowledge that our backgrounds and experiences may shape our interpretation of the data, yet our team had a unique blend of perspectives and a complex mix of positionalities.

As four authors who identify as Black Nigerians could relate as insiders to cultural nuances, a White British second author brought an outsider perspective. We could all relate to participants as fellow professionals, yet for coauthors who are men, this work also offered an opportunity to pursue important feminist allyship by offering a voice to the gendered work-life concerns.

While not representative of the differing social and economic realities of all Nigerian women, our sample is consistent with the aim to explore and tease out the patterns and complexities of how a more privileged group of mothers navigate career, family, and spousal roles within a context of rapid urbanization and growing professional class.

After receiving the signed informed consent forms, the interviews were conducted virtually, primarily via Zoom and WhatsApp video for those who preferred this contact method.

Virtual interviews, while limiting access to some nonverbal cues compared to in-person interactions, offered a more cost-effective and convenient way to connect with busy working mothers (Lobe et al. 2022) . Interviews were carried out by the lead author and two research assistants, who also transcribed all the interviews. Each semi-structured interview was conducted in English and lasted for 30 -60 minutes. The conversation was initiated with two key questions: (1) How do you see yourself as a working mother in Nigerian society? (2) As a working mother, how do you manage your work and motherhood responsibilities? Follow-up questions were then asked to further explore mothers experience, such as: How did that make you feel?' Why did you make that choice? What or who influenced your decision about that?

Given the exploratory nature of the study, we adopted thematic analysis (Braun and Clarke 2006) . A preliminary inductive coding was done separately by the first two authors following subsequent discussions with co-authors. We used manual coding to identify patterns of words, phrases, and sentences related to how women construct themselves as working mothers, followed by organizing the codes into themes. We then collaboratively refined each of the themes, going back and forth between theory and data in an iterative process. The application of our theoretical framework meant that when refining the codes into themes, we noted the different discursive repertoires which underpinned femininity constructions on which our participants drew when making sense of themselves s working mothers, noting the patterns of how they engaged with these different discourses. This resulted in the identification of three key patterns in which women negotiated the ideals of traditional femininityembracing traditional femininity, reluctantly acquiescing to, and refusing. In the next phase of analysis, driven by our theoretical pursuit to understand why women adopt particular femininity constructions, we identified the different appeals and penalties that shaped how women navigated their sense of self as working mothers.

FINDINGS: NAVIGATING TRADITIONAL FEMININITY

When our interviewees were asked how they see themselves as working mothers, almost all started by reiterating how challenging it was to combine the two roles. The presence and pressure of the dominant cultural ideals came through strongly as virtually all interviewees acknowledged that, as Farah, a 31-year-old Procurement Officer, put it 'society dictates much of who we are as women'. However, the ways in which women engaged with these dictates was complex.

Embracing Traditional Maternal Femininity

Despite having successful careers and well-paid jobs, a significant proportion of our interviewees constructed themselves primarily through the traditional repertoire of motherhood, suggesting that family and children come first, despite their careers, and that they would rather be viewed as good mothers. At a closer look, for most women in this category, these interpretations of 'good womanhood' and the role of men and women were underpinned by religious discourses. For instance, Mary, a 30-year-old mother of three, explained:

In Nigeria, culture and religion support that women should submit to men. As a Christian, the Bible states that I must submit to my husband in everything as a wife because he is my 'head'. I'm a fervent believer in the gospel…I can't go against God's command, so I must see myself as being under my husband's lordship… Similarly, religious tenets also guided how many Muslim interviewers made sense of the kind of femininity they should aspire to, as illustrated by Farida, a Credit Controller:

As a Muslim, it is taught that we can't do work that stops us from fulfilling our domestic work at home… The Muslim religion, for example, reserves some exclusive leadership positions for men. So, as a woman, you can't even think of aspiring for those positions. As Farida's quote indicates, compliance with these traditional repertoires seemed to reduce potential conflict of who they are because, women simply did not feel pressure to aspire to certain careers.

Aisha, who is a commercial executive in manufacturing, also explained: My faith is my anchor… I know many interpretations of the cultural expectations of men and women exist. Regardless, my personal interpretation of the Holy Qur'an makes it clear that women are to be submissive to men. I don't know why we keep fighting against what Allah has called us to be.

Interestingly, Aisha's quote shows awareness of other ways of interpreting the scripture, possibly reflecting the existence of feminist theology that emphasizes reducing women's marginalization (Kaunda and Pokol 2019 ). Yet, she is unwilling to draw on these, possibly less conservative discourses. Hence, some women we interviewed were clearly cognizant of alternative cultural discourses, therefore compliance with traditional ideals cannot be solely interpreted through a lack of alternative vocabulary or direct coercion (Gavey 2011) . Instead, the appeal of defining oneself as a good religious subject is also shaping women's self-discipline to comply, echoing some existing arguments that women's adherence to religious practices is often not seen as oppression but in a more complex way (Avishai 2008) .

Traditional maternal femininity was appealing in other ways too. For instance, many interviewees like Esther, a 28-year-old pharmacist, argued that 'culture allows women to be valued for what we can contribute to the upbringing of our children and taking care of others'. Thus, compliance entailed positive outcomes, both personal but also broader ones, like feeling part of upholding tradition as Aaliyah, a 25-year-old HR Manager explained: I think our culture is beautiful regardless of its limitations. Aaliyah is clearly aware of alternative cultural constructions of femininity circulating on social media but maintaining family happiness shaped her desire to strive for traditional maternal femininity. Her quote also echoes some existing literature that links the maintenance of traditional gendered subjectivities to nation-building through sustaining the sense of pride in cultural values (Balogun 2012 ).

In fact, some interviewees, like Dorcas, a 33-year-old Systems Manager, interpreted the slowly occurring change of the gendered norms as a loss:

Here in Nigeria, you are required to not just care for your children but also other people's children. I would call it a 'community of care', at least, that was how I was brought up by my parents. But I think in our current times, we may be gradually losing those values because, as women, we are much busier than our mothers were years ago.

Furthermore, in circumstances where the world of work remains a gendered environment (Adisa et al. 2019; 2021) , traditional femininity was a much more attractive alternative in contrast to what the 'new' career drive had to offer. For instance, some like Sandra, a 30-year-old mother of three, remarked on the lack of government and workplace support, suggesting that juggling work and motherhood is 'both a physical and emotional battle' and involves juggling 'many emotions and guilt of not wanting to fail as a mother and career woman'. Farida also added that: Some women in these [top managerial] positions don't even have a life, it's either they are divorced, separated or have issues at home because the industry has this culture where time spent at work is equal to your level of commitment. […] I don't really see myself doing that because I want to have a life. I can't be leaving home when my children are asleep and then come back late at night. Both Sandra's and Farida's sentiments echo the 'trade-offs' of pursuing career-orientated femininity highlighted in the analysis of 'competing devotions' (Blair-Loy 2005) for mothers in the Western context, including feelings of guilt and frustration associated with not 'living up' to either motherhood or career ideals (Adamson 2017; Orgad 2019 ). However, while careerrelated sacrifices were high, as Karimah, a 30-year-old Managing Director, articulated: 'The pressure women feel as a failed employee is usually lesser than as a failed mother or wife'.

Hence, in the Nigerian context, where traditional maternal subjectivity still affords women an opportunity to achieve a positive sense of self, it is not surprising that many professional working mothers continued to define themselves primarily in these terms.

However, compliance with traditionalism also meant accepting the limitations that come with it. Most interviewees admitted that their husbands did not participate in household and childcare duties and that they alone were shouldering the burden of the 'second shift' (Adisa et al. 2019; 2020; Epie, 2023; Mordi et al. 2023) . Moreover, as Farah explained, adhering to traditional ideals did not shield women from workplace sexism and discrimination: I don't go about disrespecting men. I think men like it when you are respectful and won't challenge you if, as a woman, you also don't challenge them unnecessarily. Some men need rehabilitation, though, because they sometimes do things that make you wonder if they are in their right senses. I remember having an argument with a male colleague at work. […] I was trying to make him see his mistakes in a respectful way, but he told me to shut up and said some awful things, which made me upset, and I reported this to HR.

Farah's example indicates that by simply occupying a professional role women could be perceived in breach of gender norms, even if they endorse them. Farah interprets this paradox through the trope of 'exception', suggesting that only 'some' men who are 'not in the right senses' would behave like this. Interestingly, this resembles the rhetorical excuse of sexism as an 'outdated exception' in the Western context, which scholars argue works to obscure the ingrained inequalities (Adamson 2017) . In Farah's case, it does appear to allow her to continue to self-discipline to strive for traditional feminine ideals without further questioning or dissonance.

To sum up, a sizable group of interviewees seemed to embrace traditional motherhood ideas as a central part of their identity due to religious and cultural influences. This brought them a sense of fulfillment and social value, despite facing unequal domestic duties and workplace discrimination.

Reluctant Acquiescence to Traditional Femininity

While some accepted traditional femininity relatively eagerly, a significant proportion of women did question traditional assumptions. For instance, Emmanuella, a 33-year-old Marketing Executive suggests that: 'It is scary to know that in 2023, many Nigerian men still think women should solely be responsible for childcare and general household chores… all because culture positions them as the head of the family'. She implies that these ideals are outdated. Many interviewees agreed, suggesting that family socialization and culture perpetuated these. However, despite reflexive awareness and at least partial disagreement, many women felt they had to complyalbeit reluctantly, due to intense social pressure and the threat of penalties. As Cynthia, a 28-year-old Sales and Marketing Lead, puts it: …sometimes, there is nothing we [women] can do about it because you don't want society to say all kinds of stuff about you... They will call you terrible names because they think you altered tradition by disrespecting men; the way they will treat you will be worse than someone who killed or committed murder. Women are suffering in this country, but all we can do is play along if we don't want to face the negative repercussions.

The prospect of social repercussions like social ostracization and 'everyday backlash' (Jung and Moon 2024) was a strong disciplining force that prevented women from openly striving for alternative femininity and defining themselves through discourses of career ambitions or equality. Resisting traditional norms was described as a 'constant fight' which required energy and emotional labor. Chidinma, a 31-year-old Secondary School Teacher, stated: I believe women deserve independence and fulfilling careers. However, society's judgment stings because they whisper behind your back, questioning your commitment to motherhood just because you have ambition… Trust me, it was part of the pressure that led me to become a teacher even though I studied mechanical engineering at university… That constant family pressure led me to become a teacher… Chidinma clearly does not agree with the gendered status quo. In fact, later in the interview, she calls patriarchal ideas that women should be confined to motherhood and home as 'nonsense', suggesting that society 'needs to go past it'. Many others, like her, were fully aware of alternative repertoires of feminism, career ambition and equality. Yet, society's judgement manifested in day-to-day realities like family pressure often took its toll.

Too much resistance also had other material consequences like relationship breakdown.

Zara, a 32-year-old Secondary School Teacher, explained:

One of the most difficult decisions I've had to make after giving birth to my first child was whether or not to return to work after my maternity leave… Eventually, I gave up work for three years… I wanted to bond with my child, and I also couldn't bear the grumbling of my husband and relatives, who kept raising concerns about the consequences of not being around as a mother. It was a hard choice, but I had to give in because it was beginning to threaten my marriage.

Zara clearly did not wish to define herself through traditional maternal femininity tropes, and later in the interview, she says that she loves her job. Yet, the potential break-up of her marriage was the price she was not willing to accept, which is unsurprising given the stigma and ostracization of divorcees (Lazarus et al. 2017) . The intensity and emotional investment involved in everyday resistance and harsh social penalties served as a significant disciplining force that made women reluctantly acquiesce to traditional norms even if they did not agree with it. As Becky, a 30-year-old Senior Tax Consultant put it: I advise other women who continue to challenge cultural norms to be happy with being feminine rather than feminist. […] I would like to see us being treated fairly, but if not, I don't have the energy to fight tradition. I'd rather be seen as submissive than rebellious.

In addition to reluctantly adhering to traditional motherhood identity, women also felt they had no choice but to comply with traditional feminine ideals of being subservient at work. Accounts of workplace sexism were ample. Yet, despite holding professional or managerial positions, these attitudes were not openly challenged, partly for fear of losing their job or clients, and partly due to seeing this resistance as ultimately futile. For instance, Sandra stated: I remember being called 'uncultured' because I disagreed with my boss' decision despite being quite courteous [laughs] . So, you can either accept the fact that a woman will continue to be perceived as confined to the home or kitchen, or you continue in an endless battle for equality. [… ] I didn't have a choice but to let it go, especially because he was my oga ['boss'] . I need the job to be able to support my family.

Becky also shared her struggles: I don't force it, I mean wanting to fight for gender equality. I have had to maintain it [my career] by acting respectfully or, as some might say, submissive. I think it's all about knowing when to keep quiet and when to talk... My role is not something that you can find many women doing, so if I don't want to get kicked away [sic], I maintain a low profile, especially when dealing with male bosses. Becky's account is characteristic of several other women who held more senior roles. She was a senior tax consultant in financial services, a position that was clearly difficult to achieve.

Hence the threat of losing a successful career was restraining her rebellion. Furthermore, being a token in these positions does put more pressure on women to blend in (Kanter 1977) .

Consequently, many women who did not want to conform to the traditional idea of submissive femininity ended up reluctantly complying with it due to the social and practical difficulties of resisting the pushback. As Juliana, a 37-year-old mother of two, said:

We shouldn't have to sacrifice our personal identities or career aspirations to fulfil societal expectations, but if you want peace, you need to adapt to the culture.

To sum up, many women were frustrated with traditional norms but felt compelled to comply due to fear of social ostracism, potential damage to personal relationships or damage to careers that they have painstakingly nurtured. Despite (and sometimes because of) the relative privilege and success the women managed to achieve within the system, i.e. having a stable and affluent household and good jobs, many felt unable or unwilling to openly resist it, instead accepting 'tradeoffs' like scaling down on ambition or enduring sexism.

Refusing Traditional Femininity

A small minority of interviewees showed resistance to traditional femininity. For instance, Zainab, a 32-year-old Manager in Financial Services, explains how she did not wish to define herself in traditional norms of femininity and had to find 'creative' ways to do it: I knew that I wanted to be a career woman because I've always seen myself as one.

But in Nigeria, a woman, at a certain age, is defined by her marital status; so, while I didn't give up on my dream, I decided to get married young [19 years old], started a family as a housewife, gave birth to my three children within the first six years of marriage and started my career at 30…[…] I had to make it work this way because I refused to be seen as a housewife for the rest of my life.

Zainab clearly aspired to femininity that is different from the traditional one. Her resistance of the gendered system manifested through finding a way to 'navigate' material contextual circumstances to achieve what could be seen as the Nigerian version of 'having it all'. However, several interviewees expressed refusal of traditional femininity in much stronger terms. For instance, Karimah stated: I'm no man's slave, so even culture can't force me to be submissive to any man, which is why I run my own businesses. Forget all the cultural or religious statements that a woman is a man's property. I'm my own property. […] Women will no longer accept this treatment and will leave to flourish because we believe more in ourselves now that we are more enlightened, which is not just because of social media and what is happening in some developed countries, but because that is who we want to be, at least speaking for myself.… Rebecca, a 38-year-old University Lecturer shared a similar sentiment: I am one of the few lucky culturally rebellious women who still gain the respect of some people, especially among women who can't afford to speak for themselves. […] At work, I've been nicknamed "obinrin bi okunrin" [meaning "a woman like a man"] because people know me for being fearless [laughs] . […] I won't place myself as inferior because someone thinks I should be inferior to them.

The statements above are all characterized not simply by resistance, but by what can be seen as a refusal to continue as before. McGranahan et al. (2016) suggest refusal happens when a point of a limit has been reached, and these women clearly refuse to continue in the 'old' ways. Rather than using resources to navigate the patriarchal set up, they move towards transforming traditional meanings (Honig 2021) . While the rhetoric of 'progress' or 'enlightenment' that underpins some of these accounts is not unproblematic in a postcolonial context (Dosekun 2015) , it allowed women to articulate the desire for broader social change.

These participants constructed themselves in explicitly feminist vocabularies of empowerment.

For instance, Sylvia, a 36-year-old Senior Auditor states: I have heard people call me a feminist, and I don't mind being called a feminist because I always advocate for women's rights. We can't keep allowing the old traditions to interfere with reality today. […] If you allow men to trample over you, you will only have yourself to blame... For me, I'm not allowing any of such oppressive behaviors.

The quote reflects an awareness that there is a significant stigma associated with feminism (Adichie 2014; Norwood 2013) , the consequences she seems to be prepared to accept to ensure change. Others, like Karimah, also saw it as a responsibility of being a new type of role model: I think that as a working mother, you are a role model for other women who are aspiring to combine work and family. […] All I can say is that the tables are turning, and men can't continue to oppress women forever. I will keep fighting for gender equality even if people want to tag me as a feminist.

Being labelled feminist, however, was not the only repercussion of refusing traditional femininity. In fact, most endured much more severe penalties like separation of social ties and divorce. For instance, as Florence, a 38-year-old Credit Risk Manager shared: I have suffered enough to know that, as a Nigerian woman, you need to fight for your independence... I divorced my ex-husband because he stifled my professional ambition with his toxic masculinity. I've remarried, and my current husband doesn't believe the nonsense about 'a woman must submit to a man' because he believes in my competence as a mother, wife and professional.

Florence firmly defines herself through vocabulary of feminism and empowerment, for which she was clearly prepared to sacrifice a lot. Interestingly, increasing rates of divorce was mentioned by others as a sign that more women are challenging traditional roles. Florence's case also illustrates other penalties for refusing traditional norms, particularly the difficulty of being a divorcee:

After my first divorce, some of my then-close friends became a little distant because they were warned by their husbands to distance themselves from me to avoid learning bad behaviors… […] I am also a Christian, and I can categorically say that I didn't go to church for over a year after my divorce because I couldn't face being looked at in a disgusting way by others…. When I decided to go back to church, I went to a new church in another location.

Social isolation, loss of social ties, and being ostracized or even expelled from other communities like their church is clearly a strong punishment for digression. Yet, for Florence, refusal was also generative as she gained a like-minded partner without compromising her beliefs. For others, like Karimah, refusing traditional ideals meant withdrawing from the workplace and starting her own business. As she says, 'I am now my own boss, I can decide what I want to do with my time without being questioned unreasonably'.

High socio-economic status of these women, to some extent, may have helped to buffer the consequences of their choices. Florence was a departmental manager in a bank, a position that offered economic security. Karimah was a Managing Director and used existing family resources to enable her success, an option that may not be available to less well-off women.

Yet, the fact that only five women among our participants refused traditional constructions, indicates that resource is not the only condition of possibility for change, and for most, the hefty social price for challenging tradition outweighed the desire for open change.

DISCUSSION AND CONCLUSIONS

To understand the conditions of possibility for gendered transformations in patriarchal societies gaining a contextual understanding of the nuances of women's experiences in different social locations is key (Kandiyoti, 1988) . This article offers such analysis by explicating how middle-class Nigerian working mothers navigate traditional cultural ideals of maternal femininity. In doing so, the article makes several important contributions to the sociological understanding of possibilities and constraints of the gender role (re)configuration in patriarchal societies, and how patriarchal cultures resist gendered change.

We extend emerging empirical analyses of the lived experiences of working mothers in sub-Saharan Africa (Adisa et al. 2019; 2021; Amah 2021; Ajonbadi et al. 2023; Epie, 2023) by shifting the focus on what exacerbates their work-life conflict to understanding how professional working mothers make sense of traditional gendered ideals in light of this conflicting experiences, as some studies have argued that such conflict may change women's traditional gender attitudes (Evans 2014; Zhou 2017) . We have illustrated that middle-class Nigerian mothers negotiate the dominant patriarchal ideals of femininity in several waysmany embraced or reluctantly acquiesced to them both at home and at work, despite working in professional jobs and possessing richer cultural and material resources, with only a small minority refusing traditionalism.

The article contributes to the sociology of gender by extending the current theorizing of femininity (re)configurations and possibilities of gendered resistance in patriarchal societies.

Specifically, by explicating the patterns of middle-class working mothers' resistance and nonresistance to patriarchal constructions of gender and what conditions these, we extend current sociological analyses which have mainly focused on how women in more marginalized positions (re)configure femininity (Jaji 2014; Moore 2015; Stumbitz and Jaga 2020; Kamran 2021) . Drawing on the poststructuralist feminist approach (Weedon 1987 ; Garvey 2011), we have argued that working mother subjectivity is one of the key sites where the struggle over the gendered cultural meanings of femininity takes place, and that middle-class women's compliance was often achieved through the appeal of traditional repertoire and self-discipline, rather than explicit coercion or the lack of feasible alternatives. Unlike in the West, where neoliberal ideals of femininity increasingly dictate that women should aspire to a balanced 'have it all' subjectivity (Adamson 2017; Orgad 2019) , Nigerian women can still achieve a positive sense of self through adopting traditional maternal subjectivity while treating career as secondary. Traditional femininity therefore remained desirable as it also allowed them to define themselves as good religious subjects or bearers of cultural tradition. The conflict of juggling work and family, therefore, did not always result in women changing their attitudes toward traditional roles (Zhou 2017) .

When the conflict of ideals did lead to questioning traditional femininity, similarly to their less privileged counterparts, 'passive resistance' (Jaji 2014; Moore 2015) , was prevalent among middle-class working mothers. Despite discontent, many still reluctantly acquiesced to traditional ideals to avoid harsh social penalties like social ostracization, exclusion from communities, and stigma associated with the refusal of traditional femininity. Hence, possessing richer cultural resources and material resources, including working in professional and highly paid jobs, did not immediately enable women to openly challenge traditionalism at work or at home. In fact, we argued that sometimes having better work positions and resources created higher stakes in terms of subjective losses, making middle-class women reproduce traditionalism, at least on the surface. The emotional labor of fighting the cultural 'backlash' (Jung and Moon 2024) at home and work, or the fear of losing a successful and painstakingly achieved career or relatively comfortable family life through divorce all acted as strong disciplinary mechanisms which kept these women operating within a patriarchal system and reproducing it, albeit reluctantly.

By examining the constraints that shaped middle-class working mothers' patterns of gendered resistance, we extend existing sociological analyses of how patriarchal contexts resist the infiltration of new gendered meanings through a complex mix of discourses and practices that uphold the appeal of traditional femininity and police its transgression. New meanings of equality and career femininity, indeed, increasingly penetrate the cultural fabric of Nigerian society (Adichie 2014; Dosekun 2015; Bawa and Ogunyankin 2017) resulting in a quiet dissent (Octaviani et al. 2023 ) that begins to destabilize traditional constructions of femininity. Yet, our findings reaffirm the argument that recognizing contradictions and raising awareness of possibilities (Evans 2014; Moore 2015) is only the first stage in the struggle to transform gendered meanings. Weedon (1987, 5) argues that the development of a different sense of self and the strategies for changing existing institutions and practices are needed. Only a few women were able to embrace the new sense of self, and most saw little possibility of influencing institutional change as they tried to navigate their already challenging day-to-day life.

However, a small number of participants did demonstrate a clear refusal of traditional femininity, despite the penalties of social ostracization, exclusion and stigma. Understanding this strategy as refusal, rather than resistance (McGranahan 2016; Honig 2021) may be useful.

Rather than fighting on existing terms, refusal was characterized by severance of ties and a move towards transformation (McGranahan 2016) . It meant refusing relative power gained on the terms and conditions of compliance with patriarchal institutions. This was difficult, but often generative of new ventures, relationships, and sense of self. For our middle-class participants, this strategy was partly enabled through the possession of resources like better education (all but one of the 'rebels' had postgraduate degrees), having senior, higher-paid jobs or family affluence. Hence, resources may be both enabling and restraining the challenge of traditional constructions of femininity. The number of these women in our sample was too small to draw any further generalizations of the conditions that enabled them to refuse and reframe traditional meanings. Therefore, we call on further research to further explore this strategy and circumstances that lead women to adopt it.

To conclude, the article has exposed the mechanisms that reproduce the grip of traditionalism among relatively privileged middle-class mothers in Nigeria. However, we are cautious in suggesting that 'alternative' femininity constructions are necessarily emancipatory.

Global neoliberal capitalism has been critiqued for the co-opting feminist ideas of work is empowering to mobilize more women as a cheap resource (Orgad 2019 ) and 'have it all' ideals of femininity have proven culturally oppressive for working mothers in the West (Adamson 2017) . The links between femininity configurations and social change need to continue to be contextually understood (Kandiyoti 1987; Dosekun 2015) . We call on further sociological research to go beyond identifying forms of rebellious femininity to understanding the circumstances under which women shift from one repertoire to another to further understand gendered transformation.

References

1. Postfeminism, Neoliberalism and A ‘Successfully’ Balanced Femininity in Celebrity CEO Autobiographies Maria Adamson 0000-0003-0167-6101 10.1111/gwao.12167 Gender, Work & Organization Gender Work & Organization 0968-6673 1468-0432 24 3 2017 Wiley Gender
2. Theorising worklife balance endeavours as a gendered project of the self: the case of senior executives in Denmark Maria Adamson Sara Louise Muhr T Alexandra Beauregard Human Relations 76 4 2023
3. We Should All Be Feminists Chimamanda Adichie Ngozi 2014 Fourth Estate London
4. Patriarchal hegemony Toyin Ajibade Adisa Issa Abdulraheem Sulu Babaita Isiaka 10.1108/gm-07-2018-0095 Gender in Management: An International Journal GM 1754-2413 34 1 2019 Emerald
5. Social dominance, hypermasculinity, and career barriers in Nigeria Toyin Adisa Chima Ajibade Ruth Mordi Vanessa Simpson Iwowo Work & Organization 28 1 2021 Gender
6. Hakeem Ajonbadi Chima Adeniyi Olatunji Mordi Adekoya David Work-Life Balance in Africa: A Critical Approach Springer Nature 2023
7. Diffusion of intersectionality across contemporary Spanish activism: the case of Las Kellys Verna Alcalde-González 0000-0003-1058-6458 Ana Gálvez-Mozo 0000-0003-4195-4823 Alan Valenzuela-Bustos 0000-0001-9980-2895 10.1080/14742837.2022.2142546 Social Movement Studies Social Movement Studies 1474-2837 1474-2829 23 5 2022 Informa UK Limited
8. Managing the negative effects of work-to-family and family-to-work conflicts on family satisfaction of working mothers' in Nigeria: The role of extended family support Okechukwu Amah Ethelbert Community, Work & Family 24 3 2021
9. “Doing Religion” In a Secular World Orit Avishai 10.1177/0891243208321019 Gender & Society Gender & Society 0891-2432 1552-3977 22 4 2008 SAGE Publications
10. The United Nations women and gender equality in Nigeria Bello Ayodeji Aderemi Lateefat Opeyemi Ade-Ibijola African Journal of Stability & Development 14 1&2 2022
11. Cultural and cosmopolitan: Idealized femininity and embodied nationalism in Nigerian beauty pageants Oluwakemi M Balogun Gender & Society 26 3 2012
12. African women: identity, class and moral geographies in postcolonial times Sylvia Bawa Grace Adeniyi Ogunyankin African Identities 16 4 2018 Un
13. Competing devotions: Career and family among women executives Mary Blair-Loy 2005 Harvard University Press
14. Using thematic analysis in psychology Virginia Braun Victoria Clarke Qualitative Research in Psychology 3 2 2006
15. Women's online advocacy campaigns for political participation in Nigeria and Ghana Innocent Chiluwa Critical Discourse Studies 19 5 2022
16. Extensive mothering: Employed mothers' constructions of the good mother Karen Christopher Gender & Society 26 1 2012
17. For western girls only? Post-feminism as transnational culture Simidele Dosekun Feminist Media Studies 15 6 2015
18. Mothering while black: Boundaries and burdens of middle-class parenthood Dawn Dow Marie 2019 University of California Press
19. Chantal Epie Work-Life Balance Experiences in Nigeria: Institutional and Sociocultural Perspectives. Work-Life Balance in Africa: A Critical Approach Cham Springer Nature 2023
20. Women can do what men can do': the causes and consequences of growing flexibility in gender divisions of labour in Kitwe Alice Evans Zambia. Journal of Southern African Studies 40 5 2014
21. Feminist poststructuralism and discourse analysis revisited Nicola Gavey Psychology of Women Quarterly 35 1 2011
22. Espousing patriarchy: Conciliatory masculinity and homosocial femininity in religiously conservative families Melanie Heath Gender & Society 33 6 2019
23. A Feminist Theory of Refusal Bonnie Honig 2021 Harvard University Press
24. Religious and ethnic politics in refugee hosting: Somalis in Nairobi Rose Jaji Kenya. Ethnicities 14 5 2014
25. Practicing quiet feminism in the era of everyday backlash in South Korea Gowoon Jung Minyoung Moon Gender & Society 38 2 2024 I am a feminist, but..
26. A patchwork of femininities: Working-class women's fluctuating gender performances in a Pakistani Market Sidra Kamran Gender & Society 35 6 2021
27. Bargaining with patriarchy Deniz Kandiyoti Gender & Society 2 3 1988
28. Some effects of proportions on group life: Skewed sex ratios and responses to token women Rosabeth Kanter Moss American Journal of Sociology 82 5 1977
29. African Christianity, myth of creation, and gender justice: An African feminist re-inculturation perspective Chammah J Kaunda Benjamin J Pokol Journal of Feminist Studies in Religion 35 9 2019
30. Gendered penalties of divorce on remarriage in Nigeria: A qualitative study Suleman Lazarus Michael Ibrahim Edward T Rush Claire P Dibiana Monks Journal of Comparative Family Studies 48 3 2017
31. Roles of social media in empowering micro scale women entrepreneurs in Gombe State Aishatu Lawal Mohammed Nigeria. Journal of Global Social Sciences 3 2 2022 Isyaka Mohammed Salisu, and Adama Bappa-yaya
32. A systematic comparison of inperson and video-based online interviewing Lobe David L Bojana Kim Morgan Hoffman International Journal of Qualitative Methods 21 16094069221127068 2022
33. The reincarnation of the African state: a triple heritage in transition from pre-colonial times Ali A Mazrui Présence Africaine 3 1983
34. Theorizing refusal: An introduction Carole Mcgranahan Cultural Anthropology 31 3 2016
35. Forms of Femininity at the End of a Customary Marriage Elena Moore Gender & Society 29 6 2015
36. A comparative study of the work–life balance experiences and coping mechanisms of Nigerian and British single student-working mothers Tonbara Mordi Toyin Ajibade Adisa 0000-0001-5317-6606 Olatunji David Adekoya 0000-0003-4785-4129 Kareem Folohunso Sani 0000-0002-8217-2572 Chima Mordi Muhammad Naseer Akhtar 0000-0002-7488-7957 10.1108/cdi-10-2022-0280 Career Development International CDI 1362-0436 28 2 2023 Emerald
37. Perspective in Africana feminism: exploring expressions of Black feminism/Womanism in the African diaspora Carolette Norwood Sociology Compass 7 3 2013
38. Re-negotiating self-identity: exploring the role of motherhood-indicative labels in Nigerian constructing mother's identity Ifeoluwatobi A Odunsi Angela M Hosek Journal of Family Communication 24 1-2 2024
39. Trapped within ideological wars: Femininities in a Muslim society and the contest of women as leaders Fitri Oktaviani Bernard Hariana Terrance Mckenna Fitzsimmons Work & Organization 28 3 2021 Gender
40. Social Media and Women Empowerment in Nigeria: A Study of the #BreakTheBias Campaign on Facebook Deborah Omontese Osaro 2023 University of South Florida Doctoral Thesis
41. Heading home: Motherhood, work, and the failed promise of equality Shani Orgad 2019 Columbia University Press
42. Shanya Sadanandan Anju Mary Christina Paul Global Care Policy Index 2022 Country Report: Nigeria. Singapore: Global Care Policy Index 2022
43. Recovering the feminine other: Masculinity, femininity, and gender hegemony Mimi Schippers Theory and Society 36 2007
44. Female labor force participation rate in Nigeria from Statista 2023. 2010 to 2023
45. A southern encounter: Maternal body work and lowincome mothers in South Africa Bianca Stumbitz Ameeta Jaga Work & Organization 27 6 2020 Gender
46. Talk of love: How culture matters Ann Swidler 2001 University of Chicago Press
47. African Women's Movements: Changing Political Landscapes Aili Tripp Isabel Mari Joy Casimiro Alice Kwesiga Mungwa 2009 Cambridge University Press New York
48. United Nations &nr=2401& menu=3170#:~:text=Nigeria's%202020%20Voluntary%20National%20Review Nigeria 2020. 2020 Sustainable Development Goals Knowledge Platform %2D16 )%2C%20and%20partnerships%20
49. Feminist practice and poststructuralist theory Chris Weedon 1987 Blackwell Oxford
50. Motherhood, employment, and the dynamics of women's gender attitudes Muzhi Zhou Gender & Society 31 6 2017